How To Get A Girlfriend in 17 Insanely Actionable Steps

So…girls like you but not that “one” girl you truly desire.
Not your dream girl.
That’s because if you want HER to choose YOU then you need to stand out and become her obvious choice.
You’re about to discover how to get a girlfriend by becoming her obvious choice, so she chooses you over all the other guys chasing her.
There’s no wishy washy bullsh*t here like “be more confident” or “talk to more girls”.
Just 17 proven steps you can start using right now to attract that special girl you like and make her your girlfriend.
Sound good? Then keep reading…

#1: Stop assuming she won’t be interested in you!

STOP making excuses not to go and talk to the girl you like.

Like assuming she won’t be interested in your because you’ve never had a girlfriend.
Instead assume that every girl is interested in you because after all…you’re friggin awesome!
Here’s how to re-write some common negative excuses with positive reasons to TAKE ACTION!
For example:
“It’s no use talking to her, she won’t be interested in me” = “I should go talk to her she looks bored”
“She’s out of my league” = “I wonder if she’s cool enough to hang out with?”
This will help you approach girls you like with positivity and you’ll naturally become an extremely attractive guy to be around.

#2: Next time you see her give her a genuine compliment

Show her you like her by giving her a genuine compliment.
The best way is to be specific, so say the first thing you notice about her that makes your heart beat.
Perhaps it’s her ravishing red lipstick, her cute smile, or her hair is tied back for the first time.
If you struggle to say something on the spot because you’re blown away by everything all at once then simply: “Wow. You look amazing” or even just “WOW”.
If you forget to compliment her when you first meet her you can compliment her randomly out of the blue at any moment.
It’ll come as more of a surprise, for example, “You look amazing in that dress”, “I like it when you tie your hair back”, or if you’re standing behind her or even sitting in front of her, “you should checkout the view from here, it’s incredible”.
Notice how these compliments are sexual, NOT emotional.
You’ll discover why expressing your natural desire is a crucial part of getting a girlfriend in a moment.

#3: Make a unique connection with her

Think of all the inside jokes you and your best mate have and how nobody else “gets” what the hell you guys are giggling about when you drop one around other people.

Unique connections are the foundation of solid relationships. They make you subconsciously feel like you’ve known someone forever and that you’re relationship is “special”.
Now imagine how powerful this could be at connecting you and that special girl you like?
To build a special connection so she feels unique to you start by giving her a nickname.

Here’s how to create opportunities for nicknames and inside jokes to happen naturally:

• Tease her about something she says then create a nickname based on that
• Express your opinions and don’t hold back on sticking to your beliefs – she’s more likely to connect with you on something sooner
• Look at the world like a child for the first time. Always be looking for fun and weirdness in the environment around you 

#4: Be wildly unpredictable and spontaneous (but don’t kidnap lamas!)

Most people lead boring, predictable lives, so they’re attracted to people who are exciting and a bit unpredictable.

There is a definitive link between danger and physical / romantic attraction. So the more unpredictable you are, the more chance she will fall for you.
I’m not talking about smoking pot and kidnapping lamas…

#5: Keep your relationships with girls flirty (to stay out of the friend-zone)

Earlier I told you to give her sexual compliments rather than emotional ones.
Why?
Because expressing your emotional attachment to a girl before she’s equally invested in you is a sure fire way to get friend-zoned.
So if you want to know how to get a girlfriend you should also know how to stay out of the friend-zone because you won’t get anywhere if you don’t keep your relationships with girls flirty.

Don’t get me wrong, It’s ok tell a girl you miss her when you’re finally together, but NEVER in the early stages of dating.
That’s because women will run a mile if they sense you are more emotionally attached to them than they are to you.
If there’s no more mystery, suspense or anticipation she’ll get bored and friend-zone you.
The way to show a girl how much you appreciate her – without revealing your emotions and scaring her away – is to instead show your sexual appreciation for her.
I miss you = Can’t stop thinking about how hot you looked in that black dress. What delightful number do you plan to wear on our next encounter?
I can’t stop thinking about you = Is it weird that a the back of a Renault Megan just made me think about how amazing your bum looked last night?
I want to see you again soon = So when am I going to reunited with your sexy ass? Friday is looking good
I like you = You impressed me last night to the point where I’d actually consider sharing needles with you in my crack den.
I love you = I think I could have fun in HELL with you

#6: Put your mission first (think Tony Stark and Bruce Wayne)

 Billions of dollars and rugged good looks are NOT Bruce Wayne, Tony Stark and Christian Grey’s most attractive qualities.
No.
What makes these guys most attractive is that they put their mission first.
When Tony Stark is working on a new Iron Man suit or Bruce Wayne has some criminal to track down, neither Tony or Christian let anything distract them (even sex) from completing their goals.
Their girlfriends always fight to take these guys away from their mission, but it is a fight they never actually want to win, because women want men who stick to their goals and don’t drop them for anything.
So whenever you are in pursuit of a goal (like hitting the gym, building your business, or studying) you should never stop what you are doing to make time for others because your mission is always #1.
For example, you do not answer the phone or respond to texts when you are on your mission or you do not sacrifice a gym workout for a binge drinking session with your friends.
You must also remember to stick to your mission, even if it means cancelling your plans to see a girl who’s important to you:

A man who will drop the pursuit of his goals to please other people is not a man on a mission.
So although she may appear upset or pissed at you she secretly does NOT want you to put her first, especially when you are only “sort of dating” and not invested emotionally in a relationship yet:

Never apologize for putting your mission before her.
Even after you and your future girlfriend become official, you must not sacrifice your mission to “please” her by spending more time with her.

#7: Stand up for yourself (even if you risk a fist fight)

A big part of getting a girlfriend is showing her you’ll “keep it real” in a confrontational scenario and stand up for what you believe is right. That you’re a protector not a pushover.
So whether it’s standing up for a girl when someone tries to mess with her or where you strongly disagree with something she says – showing her you have a backbone and that you won’t let anyone walk over you is a huge turn on!
Displays of passion and anger show you care. And when women see a man stand strong, stick to his guns, take his chances and put his life on the line in a hostile situation it makes them dizzy with excitement.
Eric Northman from True Blood, did drastic and violent things for Sookie (his lover’s) protection. He’d rip out hearts, kill superiors and literally do anything to keep Sookie safe:

Protectors give women an intoxicating feeling of power. It rubs off on them and they love it!
Don’t get me wrong…I’m not saying you should become a serial killer
I’m saying that if you never upset the apple cart and always avoid the painful consequences of your words and actions, you’ll set women’s alarm bells ringing.
You will appear fake and weak, like you’re trying to passively please women into a relationship and/or sex.

#8:Be the pack leader HOWWWLLL!!!

Throughout history it’s been leaders of men like warriors, gladiators and soldiers who’ve set feminine pulses racing.
So the more you exude “warrior-like” leadership qualities such as assertiveness and decisiveness the more women will want to become your girlfriend.
If you don’t think you fit the bill of “Leader”, don’t sweat. All you need to do is work on developing a few leadership qualities.
Start by ditching indecisive words like “maybe” and replacing them with assertive words and phrases like “let’s”, “I want”, “we’ll go to”, etc, that show people you’re in control:

Give direction and make decisions. People are always secretly waiting for someone to tell them what to do – to give their life direction.
Even if you want to ask a question, for example, ask a girl out on a date, make sure it does more leading than asking. Like you expect her to follow you out.
Here’s an example that blends assertiveness and decisiveness perfectly:

Once you start making decisions more you’ll be surprised how quickly people (especially women) will look to you to lead the way.
You are the wolf not the sheep! HOOOWWWLLLL!!!

#9: Master indifference (explosions don’t shake you)

Ever noticed how guys with girlfriends attract women like flies to shit?
That’s because they naturally give off the vibe that they don’t need anyone else (since they’ve already got a girlfriend).
Indifference is VERY attractive because the less you need other people, the more other people need you.
Indifference means not needing other people’s approval or support to make your life complete.
It also means not giving a shit about what people think of you and being non reactive when people try to provoke an emotional response from you (even if there’s a huge explosion erupting behind you).
Women love the challenge of unlocking a man’s sensitive side rather than having it readily accessible to them from the get-go.
If you feel like you’re lacking indifference, start by working on these things:

• Flat out ignoring people when they insult you
• Not revealing your emotions when you’re sad
• Don’t tell people your plans all the time

#11: Make her wonder about you

Women love mystery, suspense and anticipation.

“What you see is what you get” bores the HELL out of women, so rather than answering a girl’s questions “matter of fact-ly” you should aim to respond in a playful way that keeps her curious about you, e.g.

The more you keep her wondering about you the more excited she will be about going on a date with you:

Making a girl wonder about you at every stage of the process is the most powerful way to keep her hooked.
At the end of your first date, for example, when it’s time to say goodbye, kiss her lightly on the cheek and say “Tonight was fun. We should do it again sometime”.
Keeping her on the edge her seat is exactly how to get a girlfriend totally and utterly obsessed with you.

#12: Be risky to get frisky 

 

When you show a girl you’re not afraid of losing her by taking risks, you send an unconscious message that your genes ROCK!
Taking risks means going in for that first kiss, turning a text conversation sexual, breaking a girl’s balls, calling a girl out when she’s wrong, etc.
Even if you get rejected for making a move women will respect you for having the balls to try.

#13: Don’t be afraid to tease her

 

Never be afraid to tease a girl you like. Although teasing may feel risky it’ll pay off MASSIVELY if done right.
If you don’t know where to begin with teasing try starting with a little role-reversal.
Women are used to guys being the sexual aggressor, so role-reversal flips the switch to make it out that SHE’S chasing YOU.
It’s a lot of fun and girls LOVE playing along with it:

#14:Unleash your sexual desire (and never be ashamed of it)

Unleashing your sexual desire isn’t creepy it’s natural!
But unfortunately society has taught you to be ashamed of your sexual desires and keep them bottled up instead of expressing them.
That’s because society is an asexual moron that doesn’t want you to get laid!!
The truth is women want to feel overwhelmingly desired, not rationally considered.
So holding back and not letting your natural desire spill out is counter productive.
Because when a man is so aroused and burning with desire that he’s willing to put himself out there, risking everything, girls can’t resist submitting themselves to his ravishment.
In fact, UCLA conducted a study in which they found 64% of women had “ravishment” fantasies.
So if you seriously want to get a girlfriend then try to express your sexual desire more often – the risk is ALWAYS worth it – because if you fail to put your intentions out there you’ll go straight to the friend-zone.

#15: Get her attention by giving her less attention

 

Is there someone in your social group who often ignores you when you try to engage them in conversation, as if their mind is elsewhere? So you find yourself repeating the same thing twice or even shout “HEY!!!” just to get their attention?
Does this person take hours to reply to your texts or simply doesn’t get in touch as much as you’d like them to?
And does it make you bat shit CRAZY when they behave like this, as if they’re being a dick on purpose?
Well that “dick” you know isn’t a dick. They’re simply non-needy and have naturally mastered the art of making people fight for their attention.
These people are magnetic because they scream high status.
If you want to become magnetic to women start by giving people less attention, by becoming less available.
Not liking her latest selfie on Facebook (like all the other guys will) or not responding to her texts immediately and going “off the radar” when you have something important to do.
People will start fighting to get your attention, (especially her).

#16: Never try to “lock” a girl down

When you’re dating a girl you really like, it’s easy to fall into the “let’s solidify things” trap.
Here’s how it works:
You start to like a girl, so you want to spend more time with her. As your feelings grow for her, so too does your attachment to that future with her.
You really want to kiss her. Sleep with her. Make her your girlfriend.
So much so, in fact, that you start to get nervous and insecure around her. And you start to feel a little possessive.
And you start looking for ways to “lock down” the future. You try to get her to commit to plans… you subtly hint at the strength of your feelings for her… maybe you even come out and ask her how she feels about you.
I probably don’t need to tell you that NONE of this is attractive to a girl.
Yet it’s weird, because when you like a girl, it feels very natural to do this stuff.
So what’s the solution?
Well, it’s simple, but paradoxical.
When you’re with her, you focus on having as MUCH fun as you can while you’re together… and NOT trying to confirm anything or lock anything down.
Think about it: if you have tons of fun the first time you hang out with someone… wouldn’t you want to see them again?
And if it just kept going like that – where you had a great time every time you hung out – wouldn’t it be easy to end up in a relationship with them?
But if they were a nervous wreck the whole time, and tried to PUSH you into spending more time with them… the only way you’d do it would be out of guilt.
And sorry to say it, but guilt doesn’t get girlfriends.
So always remember to live in the moment and focus on smiling, and putting a smile on her face, when you’re together.
You can flirt with the idea of future meet-ups but don’t try to lock her down when you’re with her. Simply add the word “sometime” to keep it open ended.
““we should totally rent motorbikes and ride down to that secret beach sometime”.

#17: Don’t give up too early

There’s nothing “stalker-ish” about being persistent if you don’t go overboard.
If done right persistence can be incredibly attractive.
Women love men who fight for what they want. So if a girl sees you’re determined in making her yours it’ll make her feel special, adored and most importantly…desired.
Because remember, women want to feel overwhelmingly desired, not rationally considered.
Some girls will keep rejecting you just to see how much you’ll fight for them.
So even if she rejects you the first couple of times – don’t give up chasing her – because if you give up too easily she’ll think that maybe she wasn’t that important to you after all and you probably only wanted to sleep with her.

Now go out and get the girl!

Before you go out and use this guide to get the girlfriend of your dreams, there is one more important thing you need to develop.
And it’s arguably the most attractive trait of them all…
I’m talking about confidence.
Your confidence will develop naturally after you start putting everything you’ve just read into practice.
There is no way to simply “Be Confident”, but after you start doing things like:

• Assuming every girl is interested in you
• Standing up for yourself
• Taking risks
• …And unleashing your sexual desire more
Confidence will develop naturally for you and so will your love life!